Category: Money

We all have material needs and it goes without saying that we cannot experience life satisfaction without the ability to maintain shelter over our head or good nutrition for our body and our brood.

However, despite the turmoil we put ourselves through to arrive at the infamous “six-figure income,” a recent Princeton University study that analyzed the responses of 450,000 Americans clearly demonstrated that once ones’ income level reaches $75,000 per year, no matter how much more we make above that it makes no difference to our degree of happiness!

Changing our perspective on how we view money and our finances can improve our happiness. Let’s explore this together.

Overcoming Burnout and Disengagement.

Burnout is a phenomenon resulting from long-term stress that is characterized by exhaustion, cynicism, escalating health issues, and diminished performance.

Burnout and disengagement (a coping mechanism) are a significant threat to our well-being and are costing over $350 billion to US employers.

Most probably, we have all danced with burnout occasionally, but for some of us our burnout story went too far, and not only are we physically and emotionally exhausted all the time, but we are also experiencing:

  • Sleep disturbances
  • Difficulty concentrating
  • Challenges with effective processing of information
  • Unexplained illnesses, (physical and emotional)
  • Irritability and impatience
  • Memory impairment

When we find ourselves in the painful state of burnout, we feel like we are at a dead end with no way out and we cannot see the light at the end of the tunnel. We expect the solution to come from outside sources -our employer to balance the demands and the resources available to meet those demands, or we start looking for another job. Research, however, is showing that it can take a minimum of two years to reverse the negative impact of burnout and return to our healthy, high-performing self, even if we change jobs and go to healthier workplace culture.

So, what can we do that is within our control to neutralize the toxic impact of burnout on our body and mind?

It goes without saying that reinstating balance by practicing basic self-care is critical to avoiding the long-term consequences of burnout. Some examples of self-care are:

  • Eat well. (Add as many fresh whole foods as possible – Avoid anything that sits on a shelf.
  • Avoid consuming large quantities of alcohol and caffeine.
  • Create a nighttime routine that helps you Improve your sleep quality.
  • Get a minimum of 30 minutes a day of physical activity.
  • Develop a plan your day ahead the night before setting realistic expectations of what you want to accomplish..
  • Get comfortable saying no and setting healthy boundaries.
  • Commit to a daily of detaching your mental activity from taxing thoughts and becoming more and more comfortable with your power to reinstate a calm state on demand.
  • Journal for five minutes before you get up in the morning. Choose an intention for the day and identify things you are grateful for.

In addition, I would like to offer you three deeper responses to burnout that really helped me when I was not only struggling with burnout and disengagement, but was also experiencing some significant health complications as a result..

  1. See burnout for what it is. If we peel back all the layers of the phenomena we call burnout and disengagement, right at the core we will find something we are all very familiar with: Fear! In fact, almost all challenges we have to deal with involve a battle between trust/love and fear. Challenge yourself to get to the core of what is truly worth being afraid of or losing sleep over. Are your fears reasonable and about things that are happening now? Or are you letting your work (title, performance review rating, etc.) define your identity and self-worth? Self-worth—the sense of your own value as a person—can only truly come from you and how you navigate life situations.

The practice: Every morning, take a few minutes to observe your thoughts before starting your day. Identify one fear that is holding you back today. Challenge your self to assess if this fear pertains to something that is here now and ask your self- “ is this fear a truth or a story”? You already have all the answers. You just have to be still enough to listen.

  1. Call burnout by name and speak about it openly. When we feel compromised inside the tight grip of burnout, we tend to isolate. We may feel ashamed and compare ourselves to how great we think others are—our neighbor, our colleague, our sister, our friend. We put so much energy into hiding until we get better. Yet, if we look closer, even the most successful people that we admire had to overcome failure and rise like the phoenix from the ashes. Every success story has a victory over the darker aspects of our lives.

The practice: Initiate a discussion about your struggle with burnout with the significant people in your work life—your work friends and your direct supervisor. Speaking openly about burnout can not only urge your organization to do something about it, but can also inspire the other (over 70%) of people who are struggling with disengagement and burnout as well.

  1. Create space to rest and digest in between sprints. When we are struggling with burnout we tend to find ourselves lost in the daze of never shutting down shop. We continue to work, even on evenings and weekends, in the hope that we will catch up and get back on track. Remember, part of the problem of chronic stress is that the most brilliant part of our brain is temporarily off-line. In order to turn our brain back on, we need to create the space to breathe and completely disconnect from the merry-go-round and the rat race.

The practice: Place your electronic devices on airplane mode and do as much as you can to nourish your soul and your body outside of business hours. Take a walk in a near-by park with your loved ones after dinner on weekdays. Let yourself reset by spending ample time in nature over the weekends, letting the sound of waves or the flow of a river wash away stressors you had to deal with during the week.

Throughout the course of our life, we have accepted a story of what will take us to some universal life destinations. Happiness, Success, and Freedom are three human pursuits that are probably on everyone’s list.

However, we seem to forget that we are in charge of determining the path to getting to those destinations.

Our struggle with stress and its cousins, burnout and disengagement, clearly indicates that somewhere along our journey we forgot how much power we have to change the words of our story and determine how it will end.

As much as you may feel hopeless and unable to see the light, remember that we can train our brain to work with us to create a happier and healthier reality. (We have the greatest Neuroscience discovery at our disposal to change our brain to for a happier reality – http://bit.ly/neuroplasticitymyndzen).

All it takes is committing to one small daily practice at a time, which can add up to making a huge difference long-term in our brain’s architecture, our health, and our happiness. And that my friend, is 100% within your control.

What Did You Want to Be When You Grew Up? I Bet It Wasn’t Burned Out!

Do you remember what you originally wanted to be when you grew up?

I wonder how many of us are doing the work that is our purpose at this level of existence?

One thing is certain: Regardless of what it is that we once dreamed of becoming in life, none of us aspired to become:

  • One of the 70% of US employees (or 86% of global employees) that are not “engaged” at work, that is, who are clocking in and out, just getting by, and dreading Mondays.
  • One of the 75% of us that regularly experience symptoms of stress: sleep deprivation, irritability, exhaustion, depression, anxiety, over-medication, or drinking alcohol at the end of the day to relax.
  • One of us who has experienced irreversible body function and/or organ damage as a result of chronic stress.
  • One of us who feel frazzled and burned out.

How did we get here and why are so many of us suffering at work? Considering we spend so much of our life at work, isn’t it time we invest our energy in solving this problem?

Once upon a time – The beginning of our relationship with burnout

When I was a young child, I dreamed of “uncovering what is toxic to humans and discovering the antidote for it.” I wanted to become a writer that told the world stories about “ending pain and suffering.”

But I was told that writing and telling stories were hobbies and that I should choose to become something significant, like a scientist.

I was such a little artist at heart. I loved photography, and I played the piano and sang, but the message was clear—none of those things were good enough for me to be considered a success in the world.

My parents, to this day, are “life of the party” kind of folks, having social gatherings with my dad’s famous guitar and singing performances that last till the early hours of the morning.

My father, however, gave up his passion for music and a record deal to become a good family man and provider.

See, my dad was not Carl Jung! (The father of psychoanalysis and the theory of individuation).

My father, like most of us, did not realize that we tend to stash away the parts of ourselves that are not reflected by the environment, which predisposes our brain to seek external approval in order to be accepted and rewarded.

Seeking external approval to feel “good enough” is the beginning of the problem!

Instead of practicing self-care and having healthy boundaries and true work life balance, we work around the clock, sacrifice our sleep on red eye flights, give up family time to work late, because that is what “professionals on a mission do, right?”

Disengagement and burnout, are a real threat to the health of individuals and organizations.

Contrary to our shame about being among the large percentage of professionals who are disengaged or burned out, research is showing that it is, in fact, the high performers who are more prone to these real threats to productivity and health. In fact, a 2013 Harvard study reflects that 96% of senior leaders report feeling burned out.

Disengagement and burnout are two of the most devastating threats to individual and organizational health. In the US alone, disengagement is costing employers over $350 billion in loss of productivity and absenteeism.

What does burnout look like and how does it relate to disengagement?

Burnout is a collection of symptoms that develop over time when work demands exceed the ability of the individual to meet them while maintaining internal balance.

Disengagement is a state of employees characterized by unhappiness and dissatisfaction at work.

Both disengagement and burnout have been proven to poison and impact every part of a person’s life, above and beyond their work. Along with their cousin, stress, which has the same fundamental origin, they can interchange with each other.

Here is a list of some warnings that you may be on the brink of burnout.

 

  1. You feel emotionally, physically, and spiritually drained.

We all work long hours and feel tired at the end of the day. But there is a difference between the sweet tiredness of a good day’s work and the exhaustion that you can’t seem to shake off.

 

  1. You have a hard time sleeping. (Especially on Sunday nights!)

Sleep is so essential to our health, happiness, and well-being. But when we live two-thirds of our life doing something we don’t feel happy about, a constant dread deprives us of even the most basic of human needs—our need to restore and reset through a good night’s sleep.

 

  1. Your performance is suffering. You have been a consistent top performer, won the MVP, and a myriad of other awards. Yet, suddenly, you feel ineffective, and you are losing your confidence.

 

  1. You are feeling anxious. Far from the heartbeat of excitement, you are starting to feel heart palpitations, dizziness, difficulty concentrating, and an ongoing sense of doom. Anxiety is not the price you have to pay to be a successful professional and can seriously impact your health in the long run.

 

  1. Irritability and anger/hostility. Small bursts of frustration and occasional feelings of anger are common human emotions. But are you finding yourself snapping often at people in your personal and professional life? It could be a sign that your thinking brain is turned off and you are operating from your primitive brain that only knows how to fight to keep you safe!

Take a moment to reflect. Do you suffer from any of the signs and symptoms above?

Now, I want you to think of a different scenario.

Imagine waking up tomorrow morning feeling refreshed, energized, and excited about your workday ahead.

You are living your values, and your work has meaning and purpose.

You feel a great sense of safety and security and are comfortable speaking your mind eloquently and assertively at work.

Your decisions are centered and driven by the mutual value of creating a healthy reality for both your body and the profit margin of your organization.

Your voice is heard and valued by your leaders. Beyond mission statements that focus on the lives your organization serves, your life matters to your employer.

Does this scenario sound like a pipe dream?

If it does, let it be a wake-up call.

It may be time to take some steps today to avoid or overcome burnout.

I will post my favorite Burnout Busters from the Employee Perspective next week.

You can sign up here http://bit.ly/JoinMyndZen to become part of my community and my mission to eliminate burnout and disengagement through improving our relationship with stress.

Until next time, take good care of yourself.

Tzeli

 

 

 

Self Care for a healthier, happier and more productive reality.

I am celebrating my birthday this week, one of my favorite days of the year to give myself some much-needed self-love and care. I know I ought to be giving myself “birthday love and care” every single day of the year, but out of the 365 days per year, most days there seems to be something else that takes precedence over taking care of myself.

The truth is that optimal performance; peak productivity, happiness, and health are not possible without scrupulous self-care. Our species has achieved some amazing accomplishments throughout our history: We have uncovered the human genome; walked on the moon; and created masterpieces of art, like the Sistine Chapel. But we continue to fall short at practicing self-care, which is a major obstacle to realizing self-mastery.

Why is taking care of ourselves so hard for us to put into practice?

Here is a small collection of guidelines about self-care—possibly the most critical component to realizing all noble human pursuits:

  1. If and when the cabin pressure drops, you have to put on your mask first before you can help anyone else that may need your assistance!

Isn’t it time we got over the conditioned way of thinking that we are selfish if we take care of ourselves before we take care of the ones we love? If we have people we love in our lives, we need to remember that we cannot be there for anyone in our lives if we become ill.

  1. Re-think your “number goals,” and change them to ones that truly matter.

We often sacrifice self-care for the goal most of us make number one on our numbered lists of goals: money! But which of these number-related goals might be more important than money: Thirty minutes a day of physical activity? Five servings of fruit and veggies everyday? Twenty-five grams of fiber per day (if you are a woman) or thirty-five grams (if you are a man)? What unique, beautiful, body number goals should you be considering? Do you need to have a blood pressure goal, or an HbA1C goal if you are a diabetic? Re-think your number goals.

  1. When it comes to your physical health, strive for balance versus perfection.

If you don’t get your thirty minutes of exercise today, can you add an extra ten minutes per day over the next three days? Events happen that take us off-balance. Becoming good at reinstating our balance when it’s lost is one of the most important and impactful things we can do to take good care of ourselves. After all, we cannot eliminate the myriad of life situations that will often challenge us and in significant ways. However, becoming better at how we land back on our feet after each setback and regain our balance is key to arriving at desired outcomes.

  1. Nurture your mind everyday.

Self-care goes above and beyond the American Medical Association’s recommendations regarding our physical health. Challenging yourself to find one way to nurture your mind everyday will increase the grey matter in the parts of your brain associated with inner strengths like resilience.

It only takes a few minutes to listen to a TED Talk or a short, guided meditation, or to read a few pages of a powerful book. But the benefits of re-sculpting your brain toward a happier you last forever!

  1. Self-talk matters.

How do you talk to yourself? Often, we are our self’s worst critic. We camouflage self-criticism under the label “high standards.” A helpful antidote is to picture yourself as your BFF (your best friend forever). How would you talk to them? If your self-talk does not pass the “BFF test,” it’s time to revamp the elements of your internal dialogue. Reframing is a fabulous way to calm our nervous system and bring us back home. For example, if we try something and fail, we can look at it from this perspective: “We are a fabulous person simply having an experience of failure.” Although it may seem like semantics, the act of reframing a negative to a positive is enough to allow us to support our nervous system to work with us towards our health and not exhaust it by employing it for our defense from imaginary threats.

 

  1. Give yourself the gift of connection and human touch everyday.

Regardless of how many ups and downs each day may bring, make the time to hold your loved ones up close and personal. When we hold or touch a person we love, the hormone oxytocin floods our blood stream. Oxytocin is a potent modulator of critical nervous system functions involved with anxiety, depression, and pain perception. If you feel that life becomes a little too much at times, don’t forget oxytocin—the most natural and potent anti-depressant, which is free and has no side effects. All you have to do is reach out and touch the ones you love!

  1. Take an active stance against negative thoughts, words, and people.

We don’t often consider the negative consequences of the vibrational frequency of any type of negativity. But if you think of a time in your life when you nurtured a plant, you know how toxic it would have been if you had chosen to water your plant with an acidic fluid, like bleach or vinegar. We, too, are delicate flowers easily taken off our optimal levels by any threat that sounds our alarm! There is nothing more alarming than negative thoughts, words, and people.

Each and every one of us has a very special purpose, regardless of our background, history, or humble beginnings.

We often believe that the economy, unique life situations, or circumstances outside of our control are responsible for us not living the life we want and deserve.

The truth is that we have everything we need to arrive at all our desired outcomes.

All we have to do now is focus on effectively closing the gap between the optimal results we expect and the quality of care we provide ourselves.

As it turns out, the love we put into anything important at work or at home will determine our results.

But the one thing we need to always remember is that we cannot love anyone anymore than we love ourselves.

The time to start loving yourself more is now!